Get pooped midday? Rachel Harris, Ph.D., author of 20-Minute Retreats, recommends using an energy-boosting technique that complements your learning style. Find yours below:
* if you’re a visual person …
Picture the glasslike surface of a calm lake, which reflects the surrounding trees. Then focus on a rock that’s been dropped in the lake and how it makes concentric circles of ripples. Watch the ripples slowly disperse as the lake’s surface returns to calm.
* If you’re a hands-on person …
Sit with your legs crossed. Rub your palms together to create an energizing friction in them. Then gently stroke the invisible “energy field” that surrounds you, keeping your hands a few inches from your body. Stretch to cover the top of your head, the middle of your back, and the soles of your feet.
* If you’re a verbal person …
Use your name (or nickname or pet name–whichever one evokes your best feelings) as a mantra. Inhale and exhale while you imagine that you can hear your name being called. Then try to hear it from all four corners of the space you’re in; whispered and called from a distance; and from deep within you.
Is happiness your guilty pleasure?
Many women refrain from expressing their happiness to their friends, co-workers, and relatives, says Pam Johnson, a motivational speaker in Dallas who says guilt may be behind our shyness. “The self-help age we live in has enabled us to confess problems, but it’s also programmed us to focus on what’s wrong with things,” she explains. “You may also secretly worry that your happiness will eventually fall apart.” It’s hard to enjoy life when you’re worried about losing what you’ve gained, says Johnson. “Try to notice when you’re going with the flow and having fun and you’re not worried that things aren’t perfect,” she suggests. It may also help to jot down all the good things that happened during your day right before you go to sleep.
4 EXTRA REASONS TO BE PROUD OF YOURSELF
We can all use an additional pat on the back. (Start with our list and add your own.)
1. You didn’t blow your summer-shoe budget on one frivolous pair of designer sandals (even though you did spend countless hours searching for a much cheaper knockoff).
2. You left enough of your favorite sorbet to enjoy tomorrow night (and saved yourself a trip to the grocery store).
3. You treated yourself to a sea-salt pedicure at a salon (and you didn’t get upset when you chipped your big toenail walking out to your car).
4. You taught your kids how to enjoy a summer sunset (and how to leave you alone so you can enjoy it).
3 secrets of satisfied women
We asked you how you make things go your way when others oppose you:
“I flatter my audience. Recently, I said to my boss, `Listen, I need your help. You have so much more experience and wisdom than I do. I’d love to hear about how you think I could use my skills to better help this company.’ I got her advice–and a promotion–which is exactly what I wanted.”
–Solange Sanderson, 41, Seattle
“My persistence pays off. I’ve even convinced my stubborn brother to make the hour-long trip to my house for dinner. He groaned about the drive once, so I said things like, `But I haven’t seen you in sooo long.’ I laid it on until he admitted that he had no excuse to not come.”
–Jennifer O’Donnell, 30, New Rochelle, NY
“I acknowledge how the people I’m dealing with must feel. It calms them down if they’re upset or confused. Then I hint at the advantages they’d have if they did things my way.”
–Peggy Wallace, 40, San Francisco